Exploring the Dark Side of Retro Gaming: The Worst Games Ever Made

30 July 2025

Retro gaming often conjures up warm, fuzzy feelings. We think of classics like Super Mario Bros., The Legend of Zelda, and Sonic the Hedgehog. But let’s be real—just because it’s retro doesn’t mean it’s great. For every gem from gaming’s golden era, there’s a festering dumpster fire of bad design, frustrating mechanics, and flat-out laziness. Today, we’re putting on our rubber gloves and diving into the dark side of retro gaming — a cringe-worthy journey through the worst games ever made. You might laugh, you might cry, but one thing's for sure: you’ll be glad these disasters stayed in the past.

What Makes a Game "The Worst"?

Before we dive into the rogues' gallery of gaming disasters, let’s set the stage. What exactly makes a game bad? Is it broken mechanics? An incoherent story? Or maybe graphics so horrifying they invade your dreams? Truth is, it's often a mix of everything. A terrible game isn’t just boring—it’s the kind of experience that makes you question why it even exists.

Bad games stick out by either being overambitious or phoning it in completely. Sometimes, they’re a victim of rushing to meet a release date. Other times, they’re just downright bizarre choices nobody asked for (Looking at you, E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial). Whatever the reason, the games we’re about to talk about are undisputed legends*—but for all the wrong reasons.

The Hall of Shame: Retro Games That Defined Awfulness

1. E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial (Atari 2600): The King of Terrible Games

Let’s start with what is arguably the most infamous bad game in history. Released in 1982 for the Atari 2600, E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial is legendary for how utterly unplayable it is. Imagine releasing a movie tie-in game where the main mechanic involves falling into pits. Over and over. And over again. Sounds fun, right? (Spoiler: It’s not.)

The developers had only five weeks to throw this game together to meet holiday demand. And boy, does it show. Players had no idea what they were supposed to do, the graphics were crude even by Atari standards, and the controls? Let’s just say they were about as intuitive as assembling IKEA furniture without instructions.

Fun fact: Millions of unsold copies ended up buried in a landfill in New Mexico. Yes, literally. The game was that bad.

2. Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing (PC): A Game With No Rules

Have you ever played a racing game where winning isn't just easy—it’s impossible to lose? Enter Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing, the undisputed king of unfinished shovelware. Released in 2003 (yeah, it’s technically retro at this point), this truck-racing game is so buggy it could double as a nature documentary.

Here’s the kicker: Your opponents don’t even move. That’s right—the AI literally doesn’t work. Oh, and you can drive through obstacles like mountains and buildings because collision detection is apparently overrated. The developers didn’t even bother programming a reverse-speed limit, so you can drive backward to infinity. Sounds like a game-breaking cheat, right? Nope, it’s just the game being itself.

3. Shaq Fu (Sega Genesis / SNES): When Basketball Stars Should Stick to the Court

Don’t get me wrong—Shaquille O’Neal is awesome on a basketball court. But as a video game protagonist? Not so much. Shaq Fu dropped in 1994 and became one of the most baffling fighting games to grace the Sega Genesis and SNES. The premise? Shaq gets sucked into another dimension and must use martial arts to save a boy. Why Shaq? Why martial arts? Nobody knows.

The controls were clunky, the hit detection was a joke, and the storyline made zero sense. The game got so much hate that it inspired a literal movement called "The Shaq Fu Liberation Front," dedicated to destroying copies of the cartridge. Brutal.

4. Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties (3DO): The Most WTF Game Ever

Imagine a game that promises to be an interactive romantic comedy. Sounds intriguing, right? Now imagine it’s mostly a poorly shot slideshow with occasional text choices. Meet Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties, a game so bizarre it could double as experimental performance art.

Released for the 3DO in 1994, this "game" was marketed as a full-motion video (FMV) experience. Spoiler alert: It’s not. What you get instead is grainy photos, awkward acting, and a nonsensical plot. The title alone is hilariously misleading—neither plumbing nor ties make much of an appearance. Honestly, this game feels more like a fever dream than a playable experience.

5. Action 52 (NES): Quantity Over Quality

Have you ever heard the phrase "Jack of all trades, master of none"? Action 52 is basically the video game version of that. Released in 1991 for the NES, this cartridge boasted 52 games. Sounds like a deal, right? Wrong. The problem is none of these so-called "games" are remotely functional.

From nonsensical names (Cheetahmen, anyone?) to mechanics that are either broken or nonexistent, Action 52 is the poster child for quantity over quality. One of the games, Ooze, doesn’t even load—it literally crashes the system! Honestly, if you’ve ever wanted to see what a cash grab looks like in pixel form, give this a whirl. Just don’t expect to have fun.

6. Night Trap (Sega CD): Controversial but Laughably Bad

Night Trap gained notoriety not because it was good, but because it sparked a moral panic. Released in 1992 for the Sega CD, this FMV game tried to blend live-action video with gameplay. The result? A clunky, campy spy game where you’re tasked with protecting a house full of teenage girls from vampire-like attackers called "Augers."

The gameplay boils down to watching security footage and pressing buttons at the right time, which gets old fast. Plus, the acting makes soap operas look like Oscar-winning performances. Despite its terrible quality, Night Trap became infamous for supposedly being "too violent," leading to congressional hearings about video game regulation. Spoiler: There’s no actual gore. Just bad acting and awkward dialogue.

Why Do These Games Still Matter?

Okay, so we’ve trashed these games pretty hard. But here's the thing—they still hold a weirdly important place in gaming history. As much as they’re examples of what not to do, they also paved the way for improvements.

Take E.T., for example. Its catastrophic failure directly contributed to the 1983 video game crash, forcing the industry to rethink its approach to quality control. Shaq Fu? It’s a hilarious cautionary tale about celebrity tie-ins. And Night Trap, despite being objectively bad, helped spark conversations about video game ratings, leading to the creation of the ESRB.

Final Thoughts: Laugh, Cry, and Learn From the Worst

Let’s face it—bad games are kind of like that one ridiculous friend who always makes terrible decisions. Sure, they’re a mess, but they’re also endlessly entertaining to talk about. And while we laugh (and maybe cringe) at the dumpster fires of gaming’s past, we should also appreciate how far the industry has come.

So the next time you’re frustrated because a modern game has a couple of glitches, just remember: it could be worse. You could be playing Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties.